One of the fairest approaches to splitting college costs is to split
the remaining costs according to ability to pay. Ability to pay might
be measured in proportion to each parent's adjusted gross income. For
example, if one parent has an adjusted gross income of $100,000 and
the other parent $50,000, a total of $150,000, then the first parent
would pay for two-thirds of the remaining college costs (i.e.,
$100,000 / $150,000) and the other parent would pay one third (i.e.,
$50,000 / $150,000). This approach can be refined by substituting
discretionary income for adjusted gross income. Discretionary income
is calculated by subtracting 150% of the
poverty line
from adjusted gross income.
Neither you nor your husband is likely to be entirely satisfied with
this answer, which is often a good sign of a reasonable compromise.
Other families will split the remaining costs evenly, with each parent
paying half of the remaining costs. This approach assumes that each
parent has an equal obligation to contribute to college costs,
regardless of ability to pay. It isn't necessarily fair, since it
places a relatively greater financial burden on the parent who is
least able to pay.
Unfortunately, all too often children get caught in the middle of
disputes like this one, especially when each parent is trying to
minimize his or her costs instead of concentrating on helping the student
pay for and graduate from college. Students whose parents are divorced
are much less likely to graduate. For example, based on the 2009
Beginning Postsecondary Students longitudinal study, 31.3% of children
of divorced parents who first enrolled in college in 2003-04 graduated
with a Bachelor's degree by 2009, compared with 45.2% of children
whose parents were still married. A 1998 study by Judith
S. Wallerstein and Julia M. Lewis showed that children of divorced
parents are less likely to matriculate in college and receive less
financial support than children of intact marriages. According to the
study, 29% of children with divorced parents get parental support for
college expenses, compared with 88% of children from intact families.
Ask your daughter to keep your ex-husband informed about her college
experiences and accomplishments, and perhaps even ask him for advice
from time to time. This will help avoid problems later, since divorced
parents who feel excluded are less willing to continue paying for
their child's college education. She's his daughter too, and an
occasional telephone call, email message or letter will make him feel
better about writing a big check every semester.
Note that neither parent should have "access" to the financial aid
funds. The loan proceeds and other financial aid should be paid
directly to the college where they will be applied to tuition, fees
and other institutional charges. Any excess funds will be refunded to
your daughter, who will use them to pay for textbooks, supplies and
other college costs. Student financial aid funding, including the
proceeds of education loans, must be used only to pay for expenses
relating to attending an institution of higher education. This is a
matter of federal law, per section 484(a)(4)(A) of the Higher
Education Act of 1965.
Finally, ask the college's financial aid office for a professional
judgment review (also known as a special circumstances review or
financial aid appeal) concerning the child support that was reported
on the FAFSA and anything else unusual or which has changed about your
financial situation. Some colleges will make an adjustment to exclude
child support from the FAFSA when the custodial parent will no longer
be receiving child support because the non-custodial parent's child
support obligation has ended. After all, the child support that has
ended is not reflective of the custodial parent's ability to pay
during the award year. (Note that child support received for younger
children should still be counted, since it will continue to be
received during the award year.)
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